My eyes are shut, yet my mind is inching closer and closer to being awake. I’m still in bed. Then, in a flash, I am off to start the day. I remember that I need to call the pharmacy, therefore, my eyes pierce open.
What was once a peaceful moment of looking at the back of my eyelids and being morphed into my bed is now another day of the grind as a disabled person.
As a disabled person, this looks like dialing the number, waiting as the phone rings, explaining my need for a refill, encountering an issue, and now, spending my morning playing Nancy Drew.
It’s not even 9 a.m. and I’ve called the pharmacy four times and the doctors office twice. I have to figure out how to correct the issue I am having in order to get my medication. Now, whether anyone knows it or not, it feels as if my brain is going a mile a minuet.
I’ve also been to the lab for blood work and a urine sample. Somehow, even though I am unemployed, my full time job of being disabled reminds me that there are no days off.
I continue to dial Walgreens. Each time I get connected to a staff member, I just cross my fingers hoping they have a piece of information that the person prior didn’t have. The problem still isn’t solved.
I don’t have a job, yet, being disabled has taken president in my life. It is my job.
In order to not lose my marbles, I request the nurse from my doctors office to call the pharmacy. I throw the ball in their court because at the moment, it feels like soon steam will visibly come out of my ears.
Clearly, whatever I am doing isn’t getting the job done and maybe the nurse will get through to the staff at Walgreens. Hiccups are par for the course when dealing with any medical related entity or social service. What people don’t understand is that when issues aren’t solved and problems arise, it is on me to fix them.
When you’re disabled or even if you aren’t, when you deal with any health related sector, it is on you to be in charge of your own life. No one is going to do the work for you. And BOY, that is exhausting.
Now, I wait. I wait to hear back from one of the two entities. If I’m lucky, things get squared away, but if it’s just another day living as a pawn in the American healthcare sector, I’ll have to finagle more. It isn’t abnormal to spend an entire day speaking to pharmacies or doctor’s offices.
The misconception about disabled people is that when you are ill, and on disability, you just lay around collecting a check. People view it as a relaxing and low key way to live. It isn’t. Being disabled is stressful. During the week, when other people hustle at their nine to five, I hustle too.
There’s an image people people envision when they think of those who are disabled. We’ve all been there. We judge especially when we cannot see the struggle.
We don’t just relax, lay around, collect checks, and soak in resources. There is no “rewards” without having to pay a price. It couldn’t be further from the truth. I never just rest. Even if I am lounging around, chances are my mind is focused on the next task on the to-do list.
I got lucky. I got my medication filled on that same day. The nurse was able to help me. However, that win gave me a boost of dopamine. I take the win because the clock is ticking and the next tasks are waiting to be completed.
Monday is just around the corner and that means for disabled people too, our jobs of being disabled are about to clock in for the work week.
